ZK's jaundice level had improved

Brought ZK for blood test today and his level is now 218. Converting to TMC's level, it is to divide by 17, hence it is a level of 12.8 Doc had verified that ZK's jaundice level is ok but still requires monitoring and have to go back in 2 days' time for another blood test and 4 days' time for another detailed blood test. Here's goes another confinement when i am never confined at home - always busy running around to bring the boy for blood test, review checkups.

For ZQ, when we discover his jaundice, it was at level 400 and shot up to 420 when he was admitted to KKH 2 years ago. That would mean TMC's level of 24-25! It was a terrible experience, hence, anytime I'd prefer ZK to admit hospital or do home theraphy than to leave it to chance for jaundice to drop naturally. When we discovered that, ZQ was already above the danger level and the doc told me to rush him to KKH and dun even think of going home to pack the bag .. he then quickly called KKH to prepare the maximum lights available to shine ZQ. I was there during the 3 days and I could not stay over, it was a toturous experience. ZQ had to be put on drip and totally naked (not even the diapers) ... it was a painful sight and rather traumatising for a first time mother.

This time round I am more prepared for it and can handle it better. When I heard that ZK has to be admitted, I was rather glad they discover it earlier .... but when i went to the PD, when he told me it shot up from 9.3 to 16.9, i fear that history repeats itself ... felt like fainting for a second and wasn;t thinking straight. Anwyay, i rented the machine home and did a 3 day photo therapy for him and though i did not have much rest, it did not matter.

I just pray that it continue to go down. Really, I am not sure if it's linked to ginger. Last round I did not eat much ginger and ZQ had it bad .... this time round, i did eat a little (perhaps some dishes unknown to me) cos hubby in his goodwill, told my maid to cook dishes with ginger to help me pass out the wind but he forgot that it might cause jaundice to go up. Though I kept telling him i cannot eat ginger but i still find them in the food cos he did not tell my maid to stop putting ginger. Anyway, gynae also does not believe that ginger plays a part in breastmilk jaundice.

So much for today .... already vv tired after coming home from the blood test. Think I'd better watch what i eat these few days/weeks.

Comparison between ZQ & ZK

Managed to dig out ZQ's birth pics ..... somewhat i feel that ZK looks very much like GorGor. Here goes ...... the left pics are ZQ and the right pics are ZK.

Both of them are delivered on the 39th week but their weight differs by almost 700grams. Can tell that ZK is a little chubbier and more reddish. ZQ does look a little yellow already. However, ZQ was discharged without phototheraphy ... but ZK's level was 11.9, so he stayed a day more in hospital. Few days later, went to PD and the level shot up to 16.3 or 16.9, hence had to do home theraphy.

ZQ has lesser hair than ZK and ZK has nicer lips. Their eeyes are quite the same and both have 2 dimples - thank goodness, otherwise ZK will be wondering why mama is so unfair : ) Apart from ZK's nice hair, he has relatively long fingers and legs, toes, feet. Can learn to play piano in the future .

ZK's jaundice had gone up

Brought ZQ to PD review on day 7 and it had gone up to 16.9 ... my heart sank when i heard it. Yes, I do think he is kinda yellow but din expect it to be that high. It's not dangerous yet (like ZQ's) but the thought of having jaundice and had to either admit him or DIY home photo theraphy was really not what i was expecting.

After PD appt, I went to see my gynae to take out my stitches. It was a smooth process ... in fact, he just snipped on both sides and next he said, "It's done". Wow ... did not expect to be so fast cos last gynae used black string and he had to "pull" it out ... felt some discomfort .. but this time it was painless. New gynae - Dr Adrian Tan from TMC even took out a fybroid of 3.5cm from me =-- that alone would have costed me thousands of dollar to do a fybroid operation and now he did it as part of the operation- he said he oso dunno how to charge, the most it's only a few hundred. Thanks to Dr Adrian Tan. He really made my delivery C-section process smooth. I even chatted with him and the anasthetist (spelling?) throughout the operation.

Now i hope that his jaundice will go down to a safe level by tomorrow.

My #2 - ZK's pic

Delivered ZK on 20/08/2008 and he weights a good 3.655kg @ 51cm. Relatively heavy and long boy. The c-section operation went well and now I am already moving quite well and not much pain ... ZK got discharged one day later than me as he had jaundice level of 11.9 ... not too high but good to go under the photolight.

The Big Day welcoming birth of my #2

Today's the BIG day! Gonna go to hospital to deliver my #2 via C-section. Feeling excited i guess.

Finally the day has arrived after much changes. Initial date was 18/08/08, then changed to 08/08/08 then finally 20/08/08. Hhaa, seldom people change their scheduled C-section date so often but well, we've got to be comfortable with the arrangements rite? I've changed my gynae last minute too cos i felt he was rather unprofessional and $$ faced. Glad to have gone to another gynae who had given me a MUCH MUCH better user experience - never know till I switched like 1.5 months ago.

Now I wonder ....
- How will the op go?
- Will I have side effects of Epi?
- Will baby be healthy and easy to manage?
- Will baby look more like me or hubby?
- How much will my tummy shrink from current 44 inches (yes! it's a record high of 44 inches)

Now i can only pray that God will bless us with a healthy, cute, easy to take care baby and for myself, that I'll recover fast and well from the operation. Also, on how ZQ gonna react to his new brother - pray all things go well.

It's a start of a new motherhood journey and gonna adapt to a new life once again.

ZQ at Wild Wild Wet in June

These pics were taken 2 months back and as I had no time to do up the collage, it's been delayed till now. I guess this is to compensate ZQ before arrival of #2 and he gets lesser time with me.

ZQ loves to play with his "gugu" and since she is still a "little kid" herself, they get along really fine ;)

Don't you simply love his smile? He has these 2 lovely dimples which he inherited from hubby and me. Since we both have dimples, I cannot claim credit that that's my trait. ZQ looks very much like daddy but as I had always said "More handsome cos he has my genes too". Now I wonder how #2 will look like? more like me or hubby again? My guess - more like hubby since his family line has vv strong genes ..... one look and u can tell that they are from the same family. My family genes? vv weak - cos my sister's kid looks like her hubby, my brother's kids look like his wife. I hope that good genes other than looks will go to my sons.

Some thoughts

A friend called and said another friend had been warded into ICU and perhaps we want to pay our last visit, in case she goes home with the Lord as her situation does not look positive. In normal circumstance, I would rush down immediately to visit but this time, I hesitated. As I am going to deliver next week, I am not too sure if I can cope with seeing this friend in her current state of health cos I heard that she had lost alot of weight and the sight of her might affect me emotionally.

I must admit that I had been quite emotional during this last stage of pregnancy and with recent ZQ getting chicken pox, imagining the possible risk to baby should he get chicken pox. My recent "minor" car accident where a taxi bang into my colleague's car and I had a rude shock out of it. Worst, I realised how "unprofessional" my gynae was (he was on holiday and when i called him upon advise by his nurse, first words he said "I'm on holiday, can you call my nurse" .... but it was the nurse who told me to call him) .... anyway, that's another story and bottomline : I changed gynae at this last stage of my pregnancy and getting the new gynae to deliver me.

Other things aside, I still have not decided if I'd visit her .... I don't know what to say ... will I start crying? Seems that she had lost alot of weight and she is skinny to start with. Sometimes just thinking of things would make me cry and even movies too ... I don't know.

Sometimes I'd tell my hubby that if anything happens to me during my childbirth, I had already made all the preparations for the family. People say why say such things cos we tend to believe that we'd live to hundred and one .... but we never know when the time comes for us to go. It's better to make the preparations so that the family is ready (not for the loss) but other aspects. This will help to reduce their stress of having to cope with the pain of the loss of a loved one and to handle so many other admin issues. It's called planning.

Planning is good but things will go out of hand too as it's never as planned. I planned so much to prepare ZQ for the arrival for #2 and things seems to go well - who'd know that he caught chicken pox? I wonder, of all times, why now? Now he's gonna miss the arrival of his didi and by the time he comes back, how'd he react with having to share mommy's love and time with another little baby? I planned for him to say "Welcome baby" to his brother, to make balloons for him, to buy a little cake for him .... but now? it has to all delay. Nonetheless, most importantly is the good health of the baby.

Life changes so fast, we have to be quick to adapt, to make decisions to change quickly to cope with the situations. Sometimes it's tiring - what's the best decision? which is the best option? Can we take the best option? sometimes not due to circumstance we're in.

So much for my rattling .... gotta start thinking about +ve things .... baby's gonna be out soon and yes, there are lots of reading up and planning to do ... breastfeeding, handling baby, growth of baby, etc, etc. Being a mother is a 24 hour job! Cheers to all mothers.

ZQ's CC made him a card

Went down to ZQ's CC to pay school fees and chat with the teacher and update approximately when ZQ can start going school. She then passed me a card the classmates made for him. Oh, it's so sweet of them.

ZQ is still on the "Mama, bye bye" mode and i get to speak to him for less than 10 seconds. Other mommies told me that this is the stage of their life that they have vv short span and don't really talk too much on the phone.

Have another week to go before my scheduled C-sect and now trying to enjoy my freedom (without ZQ) and also to rest before baby #2 comes. Been feeling quite tired this week .... though I had taken days to rest and over the National Day. Probably due to the last stage of pregnancy i guess. Shall not waste this opportunity which I've not had since ZQ came into this world. Hubby and I are also trying to enjoy these moments together - quite a rare opportunity.

With #2 coming out, it'll be a while before we can leave the 2 boys at in law's place and have our nites' out.

Losing touch with ZQ

Been only 5 days since I have not seen ZQ personally due to his chicken pox but it seems like a long time. He seems quite happy staying at MIL place but I feel I am losing touch with him.

For the initial days when I call, he will excitedly come to the phone and say "mama ..., mama .... " in a vv sweet and nice tone. Now he has gotten accustomed to staying there without any rules and regulations, he is happy with that no control.
These 2 days, he will pick the phone and say a few words then hang up. Today it was ultimate, he will pick up the phone (which he loves to) and then utter "Bye bye" and hang up the phone. I am upset - just want to talk to him a little and hear his voice that's all.

I had heard in the background in the early few days telling him to say "Bye bye" and now it seems that he has gotten that message. So mean of that person and I know who it is.

We tried once to use the webcam with my SIL to see each other which I think it's a wonderful technology ..... so tried to do it again but my SIL had messed up his laptop (again) and now the video does not work on their side. ZQ can see us but I cannot see him. U know how agonising it is not to see your son??????

On top of that, he is now not even really interested to talk to me on the phone. Each time I call, my MIL will say that he is sleeping, bathing, watching TV, playing toys ..... and I don't get to talk to him.

Had to tell my maid to call me every few hours so I can hear him but she forgets. She told me ZQ was sleeping that time .... but, she is not clever to call me and put him on the phone when he wakes up? Upset with her too.

I really feel I am out of control here. The good habits and routines I had trained my son in and he listens, he understands and knows .... now will all be history.

At my MIL place, he watches alot of TV and sleeps vv late. They will say "Your son ah ... likes to watch so much TV" ... but they did not be firm with him and they don't know how. I hope that these 2-3 weeks at her place will not cause long term damage to his good habits ... but I have no choice here.

Just hope for the best.

The family potraits - part 2

It's tough to get ZQ to stand in front of the pillar as he prefers to be the photographer, so we can only try to capture him as best possible.

See how he struggles ......

ZQ is such an adorable boy. He's a cheerful and active boy and generally quite ok to manage. Of course, a toddler has their own whimes and fancies but he's quite a mature and understanding kid - for a 2 yr old+.

So sweet of him to come and give mama a big love hug.
Missing him quite abit since he is now at MIL place and I cannot hug him and kiss him ... have to wait till he has fully recovered from his chicken poxie.

Simply love the great charming smile of his. His 2 lovely dimples makes my day and the way he calls "Mama". No wonder they say a kid can cause a parent's heart to melt. I truly understand that.

The family potraits - part 1

It's been a long while since we took some nice pics together. It ususally is ZQ and hubby or me and ZQ - Hubby and me? who's gonna be our photographer. Guess where we took these pics? It's down at the void-deck. The government has recently repainted the estate and I asked hubby to use the nicely painted wall as backdrop. It looks quite nice, doesn't it?



Few more pics with my dear hubby. Almost like studio shots but of course not as professional but well, good enough for my standards. Afterall, these are ways to save $$ in such economy, isn't?



My pregnant belly .... so huge. Only at week 37+, I am already 43 inches .... wonder how many more inches to go before I deliver after week 38. Initially planned to deliver on 080808 but cos it's only 37w and few days, it was not a good idea. Had to give up that slot and book another date 2 weeks later.

Now that ZQ is down with chicken pox, on hindsight, it is a better idea. Had already segregated him to MIL place and heard that he is now starting to recover and of course, the most infectious period.

Cannot visit him lest hubby gets infected and bad for #2. Hence, we use the high tech webcam to see him. Comes with limitation of course, cos MIL struggles to turn it on and SIL is out most of the time. Try to make do with whatever resources we have.

Mommy and ZQ

Don't normally get a good pic with ZQ cos I am the better photographer ... haaa.
Don't get a good family pic either cos ZQ now wants to the photographer instead of the model.
Don't mean not to put hubby's pic cos not many nice ones as I've always ended up taking ZQ's pic and hubby is not exactly keen to take pics .. though I think he looks nice, rather i take nice pics of him ... but well, not vice versa.
Here one pic I really like ...

My tummy - 43 inches

Almost delivering .... last round I've achieved only 40 inch of waist ... and now it's 43 inches. Guess the tummy is stretched and lose. For a petite me, alot of pple had asked if I am delivering twins .... furthermore, my #2 is not that big .. but will be as compared to ZQ.

It seems there are alot of water inside .... like round 1, my tummy was like 5 months pregnant after i delivered. Frens who came visit wondered if I had delivered. I had to point to my son's cot and say, "that's my son, this is my tummy" .. haha

Balloons for my dear ZQ during his poxie days

Just learnt a new hobby - Balloon sculpting. It's a 1.5 hours session and we managed to sculpt quite a few balloons shapes - dog, girraffe, heart shapre, flower, bee, etc ... it's fun!

I guess this comes in timely cos ZQ is now away and I can make balloons for him since I cannot be there to care for him. Had already asked hubby to send him 3 first and tomorrow I'll bring down a few more .. else he becomes bored with it. He likes balloons.

Here's what I've made.

I hope he'll enjoy it. Never know how much I can miss my son. This is the first time he is gonna be away from me. No choice as he's infectious and I cannot afford to take any remote chance of me getting chicken pox (again - if my antibody is not sufficient) and passing it to my unborn child - arriving in another 1.5 weeks' time. Seeing so much (cannot count liaoz) chicken poxes on his face, body and back makes me so sad .... oredi cried a few times.  Thought I had already given him the jab but I actually overlooked it. Due to my ignorance, I did not realise that it was an additional jab - or I did think he had taken that jab.

ZQ - mama loves you and sorry that I had overlooked your chicken pox jab ... i thought it was part of the package for immunisation.

ZQ is down with Chicken Pox

Found out last evening that ZQ had been down with ChickenPox, confirmed by the doc.

Stressed. #2 is coming out in 2 weeks' time and ZQ is down, he'll be at his recovery stage and it's the most crucial and contagious.

I had just sent my #1 to my MIL place and already missing him. Called him and he is so cute over the phone .... My MIL say dun talk to him lest he misses me ... so upset. I told her that he's ok and will not kick a fuss so i spoke to him for a while - dunno what she trying to do. Then next, I heard her wanting to give him raisins but he has a cough and she kept asking him to put down the phone ... so irritating.

I keep telling ZQ to pass the phone to her but he dun quite understand and keeps talking to me in his toddler language. I dunno if i can tahan not to see him for 2 weeks under my MIL's care and maybe longer cos baby gonna be out and #1 is at his recovering stage. Feeling sad that he's gonna miss the most special moment which I had prepared him for ... even taught him to say "Welcome baby", make balloons, buy a cake to welcome his didi. The house feels so empty without him .... and it's only 2 hours he's away. Guess I have to pretend he is in school.

Never knew how important ZQ had become in my life cos he's always around. But yes, every single about him worries me .... it's just being a mother. I'd jump up at nite at the slightest noise he makes and check on him .. fren said I am high-strung and need to unwind before #2 arrives.

On the other hand, my hubby's so happy ... immediately suggested bringing me out for nice dinner tonite he says, since baby not at home. He's glad cos son had become first priority to me and maybe he feels neglected. *Oops. Shall have a good time out tonite - relieve the stress and give him some attention before #2 comes out and he gets lesser.

Planned Delivery date for #2

My EDD is supposed to be on 26 Aug and I am now into my 36th week and baby is 2.8kg. First planned C-sect date was 18 Aug

2nd planned C-sect date is 080808, 8pm - Beijing Olympics Opening Ceremony. Week 37+. Due to term ends, wanted to go earlier cos can go back earlier for work as they are shorthanded.

3rd planned C-sect date is 200808. It's 39th week and it's safer and better for the baby's lung development.

Now it's another 3 weeks before due and mytummy is already 43 inches .... so far weight gain is only 9 kg (minus 2).

ZQ's a mature and sweet boy

Been busy with my pregnancy n not posted .... shall do a short one here.

Din realised how ZQ had grown. He's a sensible and mature boy.
Things that he does :-
1. He massages me (tap me on my back cos I'm having backache from my pregnancy)
2. He pours a cup of warm water for me from the thermoflask I put in my room and one for his papa too.
3. He will come into the room and sees us sleeping and he will quietly wlak out of the room and closes the door. So understanding.
4. When I am in pain, he will come and sayang me.

There are many more things which is so sweet about him and he's really fun too.
Will post more as I find time and remembers them.